This is a Facebook conversation I had several years ago, but never got round to posting.
Circumstances being what they are, I think maybe this is an appropriate time to post it.
The question was, how to reconcile the Jews’ and Israel’s position with that of the Palestinians. Note that it was asked sometime before the Hamas attack in 2023 and the horrific and ongoing aftermath, and this post must not now be taken as supporting Hamas in its attack. That was a terrible deed the consequences of which cannot be considered in any way beneficial to either side of this struggle, in truth bringing immense, heartbreaking damage to both. As a Jew I cannot find anything about it to condone. And in any case, who of us knew before it happened that such a thing could happen? But there is a point to be made, especially in the light of Israel’s ensuing response, which is in itself hateful and despicable beyond all measure. The person with whom I am debating speaks first:

• “How does one bridge what is to what should be ? There need to be steps that can be taken to make the difference re how people think on both sides before there can be trust.”
• “You’re right. Nothing can be done if only one side is willing to take steps towards the other. The Palestinians want peace desperately and Israel is refusing to give it to them. So that’s that for mutual trust.”
• ” I tend to take events incident by incident and wonder just what could have been done differently in each case to move closer to do the right thing next time. I do not believe that Palestinians want peace MORE than Israelis want peace. It would be helpful to really know WHAT peace means to individuals and whole groups.The word PEACE needs a personal definition.As an example—-if, from Gaza, part of the desirable peace is to freely come and go from Gaza into Israel—-what would that look like? Are there steps that need to be taken on both sides for that to become a reality ? There are other people who could easily reiterate times when Palestinians seemed to have taken steps towards Israel and others for when Israel tried to take steps towards Palestinians. There has to be a way to move closer to a resolution….”
• ” What a complicated view of things you have! It’s simple. Peace for the Palestinians is a complete cessation of the attacks being made on them by an Israel determined to destroy their ability to resist the Israeli effort to annexe Palestine into an Eretz Israel in which Palestines would have no status as citizens. Peace for Netanyahu’s Israel is having total power over the Palestinians so that they can annexe Palestinian lands for Jewish occupation without resistance from the Palestinians. That being so, there can be no peace either for Palestine or Israel because Israel is determined to make war on Palestine regardless of the human cost to both sides. Imagine, however, Israel giving up its illegal territorial claims, and instead of making enemies of the Palestinians, made friends of them by allowing Palestine its independence, investing in its reconstruction, and granting Jews and Arabs equal rights and responsibilities under the law, including the right of the Palestinians to form their own government inside their own borders. Do you think the Palestinians would feel the need to resist Israel then? Would there be any need for war? The pity is that the average Israeli has been so confused by the lies their own governments have been telling them over the years about Palestine that they are incapable of imagining this possibility. As, it seems, are you.”
• ” There is the ideal–simple– and the real –complicated / complex. Imagining is awesome….I have never been accused of not having an imagination before. ( although ‘delusions ‘ –haha– could count in that category, yes ? )What you are imagining is the end result, not the process to get there. Your peace plan is totally what Israel has to do and a presumption that if all that happens for them, then the Palestinians will feel no need to resist and there will be no need for war. In the development phase the assumption is that there will not be any stabbings / murders of Jewish Israelis by Palestinians that will then be celebrated and that Israel will not retaliate. It could be said that the average Palestinian has been confused by what they have been told about who they should see as their enemy, forever.”
• ” You have never understood and you will clearly never accept that the Israelis are not defending themselves but are blatantly attacking with huge force a largely defenceless people. You have never understood and you will clearly never accept that when a people is driven to the kind of desperation the Palestinians have been driven, some will involve themselves in acts of desperation. They themselves will have lost family, friends, loved ones at the hands of the Israeli armed forces. Why can you not acknowledge the simple fact of the huge discrepancy between the number of Israelis injured or killed by Palestinians over the years and the number of Palestinians killed or injured? The difference is huge…..You should also check up on international law, which says that an occupied people has the right to defend itself, by force if necessary; and if anybody has that right, it is the Palestinians, who are having their homelands stolen from them by the most violent, oppressive and unjust means that the Israelis can get away with. There are now two or three generations of Palestinians who have known nothing but the hardship, fear and misery of being an occupied, imprisoned people. They’re not confused. They know what their only experience of life has been, and they long for a different life. Only a change of heart by Israel can ensure that, and for obvious reasons – though maybe not obvious to you – they don’t see that happening any time soon. So yes, Israel – not Jews, Israel – will remain their enemy so long as Israel, against the will of an increasing number of Jews, persist in its efforts to subjugate the Palestinian people and annexe their lands.”